Tweets

overtextposts:

koblala:

never-kill-on-the-first-date:

koblala:

never-kill-on-the-first-date:

koblala:

never-kill-on-the-first-date:

Hey, what’s Winnie the pooh’s favorite color?

Yellow

No it’s red because of his shirt

No, it’s yellow because he loves honey

You have no idea what you’re talking about

  • image

DID I FUCKING STUTTER?

Things heating up at the Winnie the Pooh fandom

tvspecial:

whorville:

I could win an Olympic gold medal in being ignored

did someone say something

sinnersleadtheway:

In order to date me you must be willing to do the following:

  • cuddle and never stop
  • hold my hand everywhere we go
  • eat gross amounts of food with me
  • go on adventures
  • wake me up with kisses 
  • make blanket forts

dlubes:

My sister and I used to get random “I love you” or “what’s up” text messages from our mom at like 3/4AM. We thought it was weird and funny because she goes to bed at like 10PM. So my sister asked my mom why that was and my mom responded, “Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night thinking of you guys.”

opisthocoelicaudia:

godblessoursluts:

flappypussyz:

My coffee image

How the hell are you supposed to know how much coffee is left if the cup isn’t see through ???

image

crabbyjammies:

gymnosofi:

mypatientvessel:

Dude.

My dad was telling me about these girls at his old college who invented a nail polish that paints on clear, and if you stir your drink with your finger with the nail polish on, it will react with the “Date Rape” drug and turn red.

Dude. It’s genius.

http://www.2lovemylips.co.uk/

I saw this before and didn’t reblog it because it didn’t have anything to say how but now that there is a link saying how I wil reblog it.

taddle:

kvothe-kingkiller:

deankeptthetrenchcoatintheimpala:

allonsy-sherlock:

popetwitter:

kaalashnikov:

squeakykins:

yzma:

putting milk in the bowl first is divorce worthy

wow excuse you maybe I like to soften the bristles first B(

who the fuck doesn’t wet their tooth brush before putting toothpaste on what the fuck

who the fuck does

i the fuck do

what the fuck man

fuck you

This is how civil wars are started

wonderfulslumber:

Today my 11 year old brother wanted us to go outside and play with his BB gun but my Dad wasn’t around, so I was like “idk, maybe we shouldn’t use it without adult supervision”

and he just stared at me and I realized

I am 20

I am an adult

I am the adult supervision

??!?!?!

how I feel during my first year teaching

(Source: littlecatlady)

intakings:

when i turn on the ceiling fan and it goes too fast, i feel like it’s gonna fly off and kill me

(Source: intakings)